From the Desk of Carol Soelberg:
“The war is over and we won!” continues to be the refrain from the gay lobby regarding the recent U. S. Supreme Court decisions on marriage. Contrary to what we’re hearing plenty of, the U.S. Supreme Court said nothing that indicates there is a “right” to same-sex “marriage.” Although one of the decisions struck down a part of the Defense of Marriage Act (DOMA), the net effect of both decisions is to put the debate on marriage back in the hands of the states. And that is a battle we plan to fight full force!
The good news is, the public is beginning to understand that the battle to protect traditional marriage is a battle to protect society. We are finally recognizing that the reasons government has EVER protected traditional marriage is because it the essential to creating the next generation of responsible citizens. While marriage between a man and a woman has very real value to the individuals involved, it has an every greater value to society. We can tell that message is getting through because of the onslaught of “new” studies the proponents of same sex “marriage” are producing in an attempt to show otherwise.
There are however, a few absolutes that no amount of research or legislation can change. For instance, we CAN create laws against gravity. But we can’t keep from falling if we walk off a cliff. In time, truth prevails. For this reason, I am not swayed by any attempts to make same sex “marriage” appear equal to traditional marriage. Traditional marriage is still the surest foundation to a stable society and the stronger our marriages are the surer our stability will be.
In the following article, our director of Parental Rights Marlene Hinton teaches why the confusion created about gender identity fuels the same-sex “marriage” push and why it is so devastating to children.
United Families International wishes to thank Marlene and our many faithful supporters for staying the course: for recognizing the truth regarding marriage and for taking the time to educate yourself regarding the pitfalls of gender identity confusion. Please be a voice for the family! Please show your support by speaking up for marriage and by donating here. You may also take a minute and go to our new website World Family Forum where you will find a wonderful assortment of family strengthening ideas and articles.
On To Strong Families and Societies,
Carol Soelberg
President, United Families International
Confusion Conclusion
Marlene Hinton
Robert Ludlum begins his book, The Bourne Identity with Jason Bourne as an amnesiac looking for clues as to who he is. His first tip is when a gun is tossed to him and he is told to take it apart and reassemble it, which he does effortlessly and expertly, increasing his sense of wonderment about himself.
There is psychological and emotional strength in a clear concept of one’s identity because that enables us to reason and act based on understanding. Confusion is debilitating, disrupting, and threatening (Thoits, 1991). Jason Bourne was deprived of his resources and capabilities, including judgment, because of the uncertainty of who he was, what he knew, and what his abilities enabled him to do. To survive, he focused intense energy on discovering his identity.
Although role identity is adaptive over time, a firm sense of personal identity is central to emotional and behavioral health (Stets & Burke, 2000). Gender is a primary component of personal identity – indeed of the nation itself, as stable families are the cornerstone of any society. Children are the result of gender.
How unfortunate, then, that elements of our culture are advocating for confusion through biological, emotional, and behavioral blurring of gender. Roles, such as who-takes-out-the-trash do not define an individual in the same way that gender and its physiological, psychological, and emotional potential does.
Some sociological and science researchers claim gender is irrelevant. However, the research cited in backing such claims is largely flawed. For example, one article reveals that the comparisons of families are NOT actually between same sex couples and traditionally married heterosexual couples, but rather unmarried cohabiting couples. The data for the latter vary dramatically from those of heterosexual married couples.
Also, the samples used are convenience rather than randomly selected, further impairing validity. Likewise, the research organization often has a pronounced bias, selecting and shaping everything from conceptualization and questions to interpreting data and reporting findings. These considerations make reports that there is no difference or even advantages to same sex relationships less valid.
In fact, several forums claim that domestic violence is a greater problem in same sex relationship households, so much so that a U.S. Justice Department study refers to it as “epidemic” (Callie Maire Rennison, “Intimate Partner violence and Age of Victim, 1993-99,” Bureau of Justice Statistics: Special Report, Oct. 2001). Additionally, married women in traditional heterosexual relationships experience the lowest rate of violence in comparison with women in other types of relationships (“Violence Between Intimates,” Bureau of Justice Statistics Selected Findings, Nov. 1994:2).
Only recently have we had to clarify whether two-parent homes are made up of a married man and woman. This confusion of basic gender differences weakens the strength of the concept of marriage, of family, and of parenting. It also sets the stage for young people to wonder about their own identity and explore – taking apart and reassembling in some fashion – their identity, particularly regarding gender.
Ironically, media creates at the other end of the spectrum a hypersexualized model that contributes to the morass of what young people view as appropriate or “normal.” It is little wonder that identity confusion in this and other areas is propelling society toward chaos. Emotional and psychological confusion disrupt the ability to feel contentment and peace and live accordingly (Burke, 1991).
There is great power in structure and security. In jerking the firm gender foundation from under the feet of families, we leave a quicksand of insecurity and insanity for the next generation to navigate. Married mothers and fathers are the solution.
Parenting is most powerfully expressed in assuring each child of his or her precious individuality, distinct worth and worthiness, and the unlimited devotion of family members. Mothers and fathers model this adoration in their daily interaction and response to each child. Confusion is replaced with confidence, stability, and resilience in maintaining clear understandings of identity.
Families find happiness, communities flourish, and society increases in peace when each individual acts with a certainty of who he or she really is.
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Marlene Hinton is a wife, mother, grandmother, and defines herself principally through faith, family, and freedom. A teacher for many decades, education, particularly in those three areas, is a focus. She holds degrees in history, Spanish, bilingual education, and a Ph.D. in curriculum and instruction.
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Resources
Burke, P.J. (1991). Identity Processes and Social Stress. American Sociological Review. 56:6, pp. 836-849.
Ludlum, R. (1980). The Bourne identity. New York: Bantam Books.
Regenerus, M. (2012). Children of parents who have same-sex relationships? Findings from the New Family Structures Study. Social Science Research 41:752-770.
Stets, J.E. & Burke, P.J. (2000). Identity theory and social identity theory. Social Psychology Quarterly. 63:3. 224-237.
Thoits, P.A. (1991). On merging identity theory and stress research. Social Psychology Quarterly. 54:2, pp. 101-112.