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United Families International

(Draft)

 

Green:  UFI commentary

Red:  Actual curriculum wording, red to add emphasis

Material is presented in the order that it appeared in the curriculum

                                                                                           

 

 

Language from:

 “It’s All In One” Curriculum:  Guidelines and Activities for a Unified Approach to Sexuality Gender, HIV and Human Rights Education

 

http://www.popcouncil.org/publications/books/2010_ItsAllOne.asp

 

BOOK 1:  Guidelines

 

Policy makers have called for sexuality and HIV education that emphasizes gender equality and human rights.

Educators want to teach young people the critical thinking skills needed to build

compassionate and just societies. (From Introduction)

UFI:  Acknowledgement that their sex or HIV/AIDS curricula have been ineffective.  (They blame it, however, on the lack of gender equality teaching/education.)

This deficiency is particularly worrisome because few

sex or HIV curricula have demonstrated a statistically significant impact either on unintended pregnancy or on sexually transmitted infections.

gender equality and human rights are not just lofty goals. Rather, they are key to preventing the spread of HIV and to enabling young people to grow up to enjoy good health, as well as responsible and satisfying sexual lives. (PG 4)

 

The ultimate goal of It’s All One Curriculum is to enable young people to enjoy — and advocate for their rights to — dignity, equality, and healthy, responsible, and satisfying sexual lives. (PG 5)

 

UFI:  From Table of Contents:

 

COMMUNICATION AND DECISIONMAKING SKILLS

People who speak with their partners about sexual issues have more satisfying relationships and better sexual

health. Young people would like to learn ways of having conversations about intimate topics in which they can feel at ease and self-assured.

SEXUAL AND REPRODUCTIVE HEALTH

(including HIV prevention and contraception)

This unit provides information in two parts. The main topics in Part 1 are sexually transmitted infections, HIV

and AIDS, and reproductive tract infections. Part 2 covers contraception and abortion.

 

The concepts of human rights and sexual rights are internationally recognized. They apply to all regions of the world, including Africa, the Americas, Asia, Europe, the Arab World, and the Pacific.

But many people do not know what these concepts mean, or how they affect their own lives. You can familiarize yourself with these topics by reading through this short unit. (PG 19)

 

UFI:  THE CONCEPT OF “SEXUAL RIGHTS” IS NOT “INTERNATIONALLY RECOGNIZED” –CERTAINLY NOT A TERM THAT HAS RECEIVED CONCENSUS AMONG MEMBER STATES.

 

These human rights are universal. This means they apply to all of us, regardless of our sex, age, marital status, sexual identity or behavior, gender identity, race, ethnicity, national or social origin, political beliefs, citizenship, religious beliefs, social or economic status, where we live, our physical and mental ability, or our health status.1  These rights are not conditional and cannot be taken away.

• Many people have heard about human rights in discussions concerning torture, for example.

• Human rights also extend to economic rights and social rights. These include the right to education and to healthcare. They also include specific sexual and reproductive rights.

 

1 It’s All One Curriculum uses the term sexual identity (or sexual diversity) to refer to the broad range of sexual expression, including one’s attraction to the same or the other sex. In some settings, attraction to the same or the other sex is called sexual orientation, or some other term.   PG.  24

Part of the responsibility for protecting, respecting, and fulfilling human rights rests on governments. In reality, however, countries vary in the degree to which they fulfill this responsibility.

For example, some governments have passed laws that restrict the rights of certain people, for example, by:

• outlawing political protest;

• prohibiting labor-union organizing;

• criminalizing same-sex sexual activity between consenting adults; and

• pardoning or treating lightly the murder of a woman or girl by her male partner or family member when he perceives his action as a matter of “honor  (PG 25)

 

People’s romantic and sexual experiences can become human rights issues. Only when our basic rights are honored (both by governments and by other individuals) can we make meaningful choices about intimate relationships, sex, and childbearing.

For example:

• Individuals can make decisions about if, when, and with whom they will form a romance, a long-term relationship, or a marriage. They can avoid being married too young or against their will. Or they can have an intimate relationship with someone of the same sex.

• They can decide if, when, with whom, and under what circumstances to have sex (free from sexual abuse and coercion). They can negotiate condom use to prevent infection. They are free to have sex with someone of the same sex.

• They can decide whether or when to become pregnant or have children. They can obtain contraceptive information and services. They can have a safe abortion. They can adopt a child regardless of their marital status or sexual identity  (PG 28)

People experience sexual violence in many environments. It occurs inside the home, as well as within such institutions as prisons, refugee camps, houses of worship, brothels, and unsafe school environments.

• Poverty often increases young people’s (especially girls’) risk of experiencing sex that is unwanted, abusive, or unsafe.  (PG 29)

POINTS FOR REFLECTION

Our attitudes about male and

female roles affect our sexual

behavior and our sexual health.

Research shows that young people

who believe in “traditional” or

“conservative” gender roles (for

example, that boys should act tough

or that females should be submissive

to males) tend to have more sexual

health problems. They are less likely

to use condoms or contraceptives.

They are more likely to be involved

in an intimate relationship that is

violent. Those in relationships with

a high level of male control are more

likely to be infected with HIV and

to report unintended pregnancy.

Similarly, intimate partner violence

is associated with higher rates of

unintended pregnancy, STIs, and HIV.5

Conversely, individuals who have

more “liberal” attitudes about

gender roles or who believe in

equality are less likely to suffer

these consequences. They generally

enjoy better sexual health outcomes

than their peers.

How might these consequences be

explained?

                        (PG 30)

 

5 Pleck et al., 1993; Martin et al., 1999;

Jewkes et al., 2001; Karim et al., 2003;

Dunkle et al., 2004; Koenig et al., 2004;

Zambrana et al., 2004; Stephenson et al.,

2006; Pulerwitz and Barker, 2008  

UFI:  Perhaps one of the most striking features of this curriculum is its comprehensive effort to train political activists.

4 We can join organizations or groups that fight for sexual and reproductive rights using various tactics.

Examples include:

• marching against hate crimes;

• adolescents’ theater projects focusing on living with HIV or AIDS;

• community-awareness campaigns about female genital mutilation; and

• community “watch groups” that monitor and intervene on such issues as domestic violence.

 

5 Organizations also advocate for laws to protect human rights, including sexual and reproductive rights — especially for the most marginalized or vulnerable members of society. In virtually every country, people have formed groups that are working for such laws.

Examples of such laws (which in some settings also come under religious jurisdiction) include:

• ensuring every citizen’s right to vote;

• outlawing child labor and protecting workers’ safety;

• protecting community members against police brutality;

• criminalizing “hate crimes” (threats and violence based upon a person’s identity);

• ensuring physical access to public space, including for people with disabilities;

• outlawing violence against women (outside and within marriage);

• ensuring women’s rights within marriage;

• guaranteeing widows’ inheritance rights;

• outlawing child marriage;

• criminalizing sex trafficking; and

protecting the rights of everyone to form a civil union, marriage, or family, whether with someone of the same or of the other sex.  (PG 33)

 

Adolescents can, and do, help create change — including change in their own lives.

Young people around the world can respond to issues they care about in many ways. For example:

• They are educating others in their families and communities.

• They are helping promote the policies and practices that they believe are just.

• They are helping plan and implement programs.

• They are encouraging their friends to join campaigns.  (PG 34)

UFI:  Definition of Gender:

 

Gender: differences in the social roles that societies and families expect from males and females.

Gender is not the same as biological differences by sex. People often experience differences in power in their families and societies by virtue of their gender.  (PG 36)

 

Defining Gender: 

In every society, gender norms and gender roles influence people’s lives, including their sexual lives.

2 Gender roles are learned. They are not innate or “natural.” In fact, almost everything that males can do, females can also do. And almost everything that females can do, males can also do. (PG 44)

 

UFI:  promoting gender confusion as normal.

1 At birth, newborns are identified as male or female based on their sex organs. In many settings, people indicate a baby’s sex through the use of specific names, jewelry, clothing, and so forth.

2 Some babies whose genitals are not clearly male or female are termed intersex. Some children (regardless of whether or not they are intersex) come to feel ambiguous about their gender identity, or clearly identify with the gender other than the one with which they were reared.

Almost all children behave in ways that do not match the stereotypes associated with their gender.

Two examples are:

• Many girls enjoy sports, excel at math, and have dreams of leading their country — and still feel like girls.     (PG 46)

UFI:  DISCUSSION OF HOW “GENDER STEREOTYPES/ROLES” HARM CHILDREN

 

People — including parentsoften reinforce expectations about gender through language.  (Pg 48)

 

6 Despite cultural variation, many adolescent boys share similar experiences.

• “prove” their heterosexuality, for example, by having heterosexual intercourse or even fathering a child;

• take risks by engaging in unsafe sex (thus increasing their risk of acquiring HIV infection); and   (PG 49)

UFI:  Continual discussion of how being forced to behave in stereotypical heterosexual roles leads to behavior that increases their risk of acquiring HIV infection, but seems to entirely ignore the fact that homosexual behavior is the greatest predictor of becoming infected with HIV/AIDs.

7 Despite cultural variation, many adolescent girls share similar experiences.

Around the world, girls tend to enjoy greater opportunity than boys to develop and practice one-to-one

interpersonal skills. Girls also suffer pressures to comply with norms of femininity, for example, to:

• be caregivers;

• be docile and submissive to males, underplay their intelligence, undervalue or withhold their opinions and ideas;

• accept having their rights limited;

• accept close monitoring of their dress, friendships, and their comings and goings;

• be careful not to hurt people’s feelings;

avoid having sex before marriage, even if they wish to; and

• give in to having unwanted sex [see section on Sexual Coercion in this unit; also see Unit 3, pages 106–107].  PG 48

8 Rigid gender roles also affect how people treat each other and contribute to

suicide, violence, and many other social problems.

• People who do not conform to dominant gender norms may be teased, isolated, or threatened.

• People who may be particularly subject to such stigma include: individuals perceived as homosexual, boys who are perceived as having feminine traits, women with multiple sexual partners, or people who adopt a gender identity different from the one with which they were reared (transgender people).

(PG 50)

UFI:  Normalization OF PROSTITUTION

 

Despite social taboos, many young people refuse to be isolated. Where they can, they create safe spaces to meet each other. Just a few examples of people who have formed such safe spaces include married girls; female domestic workers; people attracted to others of the same sex; transgender youth; girls who want an opportunity to play sports; and sex workers.  (PG 57)

 

Around the world, women — and many men — are seeking to expand women’s and girls’ access to and control over resources.

They are doing this, for example, through:

• policies that enable women to own property or that promote hiring and promotion of females and other underrepresented groups in the workplace;

• microfinance and savings programs that provide women with cash to participate in the informal economy, especially in places where such resources go mainly to men;

• efforts by sex workers to improve and control their working conditions;

• programs that reach women who must remain in their home or compound;

• education and vocational training that can expand women’s options in the formal and informal job markets; and

• affordable childcare that allows parents to seek potentially higher-paying jobs.  (PG 59)

 

6 Selling sex may be consensual or not.

• Some people enter sex work by choice. Others sell sex because they are unable to make a living by other means, or they may be forced into sex work through deception or other pressures. [See fact sheet on Sex Trafficking.]

• Some people advocate for the right to engage in paid sex between consenting adults and oppose the stigma and legal consequences attached to such work.  (PG 107

 

UFI: In the section entitled:  “Gender and Marriage”, they do not give any more weight to marriage than to domestic partnerships or cohabitation.  The reasons given for marriage all center around efforts to appease a cultural bias.  Promotion of same-sex marriage.

 

gender and marriage   

 

1 Many people form long-term (even lifelong) relationships in which they live together. These are called domestic relationships or domestic partnerships. People have various reasons for forming such relationships.

For example:

• they love each other, and being together makes them happy;

• they desire companionship;

• they need economic security;

• they want to have children; and

• their communities or families expect them to have children.

 

2 Some people in long-term committed domestic relationships marry formally under the laws of their state or religion. People have various reasons for marrying.

For example:

• They want to honor or legitimize an intimate relationship in the context of the values of either or both partners or of their families, community, or society.

• They want to honor or legitimize childbearing in the context of the values of the individual or of his or her family, community, religion, or society.

• They need benefits that may not be granted to people who are not married or not allowed to marry, such as health and survivor benefits and social approval of sexual relations.

• They comply with their parents’ wishes and plans. (In some settings, parents typically arrange marriages for their children. They do this to ensure good matches for their children. They may have concerns for a child’s reputation.

They may also marry off a daughter in order to relieve economic pressures on the family.) Child marriage (marriage before the age of 18) is a serious violation of human rights but remains common in some parts of the world. (PG 60)

 

UFI:  This next paragraph tells what they really believe about marriage.

 

4 Marriage is a complex and deep-rooted social institution.

• Marriage may provide many mutual benefits and supports. In many marriages, both partners work to support each other and to support the rights of the other.

• Marriage may also reinforce gender norms, including in ways that are unfair and harmful.

5 Certain social movements promote greater equality and dignity within marriage.

These include:

• movements to legalize same-sex marriage;

• campaigns against dowry and child marriage; and

• legal reforms that ensure a just inheritance, allow both parties to initiate divorce, and criminalize marital

violence, including rape.  (PG 61)

 

UFI:  Their perspective on the influence of religion

 

gender and religion

 

1 Religions hold a wide range of perspectives about gender and sexuality. These perspectives may change over time. Attitudes also vary within any religion.

2 Many people find that they do not always agree with their religious leader on issues related to gender and sexuality. Nevertheless, religious perspectives influence the beliefs and behavior of many people.

3 Religion or religious leaders may influence gender (and sexual) norms in various ways. [Also see Unit 3, page 88.]

• Some religious traditions are more egalitarian (equal–minded) with regard to gender. Others are more patriarchal (based on a system of male power).

• Religions vary in the degree to which they influence or seek to influence gender norms, sexuality, and fertility.

Religious texts may also be interpreted selectively to justify or oppose certain practices.

• Some religious leaders support information about and access to contraception, condom use, abortion, and sex education. Others oppose such access.

• Some religions support equal rights for all people, regardless of sexual identity. (This includes permission to be ordained as a religious leader.) Other religions oppose homosexuality and the rights of people who are homosexual.

• Some religions or religious leaders reinforce a double standard of sexuality. They do this by blessing both female virginity and faithfulness within marriage while condoning polygyny (the practice whereby men have multiple wives). However, others do not.

• Some religions and religious leaders support gender equality in divorce

 

UFI:  Interesting examples of groups that they believe are doing acceptable work.

Around the world, people, including many religious leaders, are working to promote values of human rights and gender equality within their communities.

• Examples of such organizations doing this work include: Women Living Under Muslim Laws and Catholics for Choice.  (PG 63)

 

UFI:  Note the multiple photos scatter throughout the curriculum depicting same-sex couples and scenes.  Example on pg 65.

 

7 Families, communities, religions, and governments often regulate and punish behavior (including sexual behavior) that does not conform to expectations regarding gender roles.

[See Unit 3 on Sexuality.]

Such punishment may range in severity; for example, people might:

• call sexually active girls by derogatory names (such as “slut”), when no derogatory equivalent exists for

heterosexual boys;

• approve harsh legal and social consequences for females who engage in extramarital sexual activity, while condoning — or even rewarding — similar behavior among males;

• criminalize and abuse sex workers, while enforcing no legal consequences for those who pay for sex; and

• criminalize homosexuality  (PG 67)

 

 UFI:  Above, note the support of prostitution and normalization of same-sex behavior.

 

4 Sexual coercion can occur in many different contexts.

For example:

• Sexual coercion often takes place in a setting or situation normally considered safe, such as at one’s home or the home of friends or relatives, at school, in a religious institution, at work, within a dating relationship, or within marriage. 

 

UFI:  Attempting to make marriage and religious institutions appear to be dangerous places – the only other context for coercion they mention are prostitution, war and conflict situations and in prisons.

 

Sexual coercion also may occur in other situations, for example, with a stranger, as a material exchange (with older partners or peers, for cash or material gifts), in war and conflict situations, and in prisons.  (PG 71 and again on PG 106)

 

 

Sexuality and Society

Do policies ensure adolescent girls’

access to safe abortion?      PG 86

How respectfully do most people

treat same-sex couples?

 

Around the world, young people grow up with different attitudes and laws regarding sexual relationships and marriage.

• Most but not all young people want to form a relationship and to marry.  (UFI:  Interesting that they admit this, but then continue to dismiss and denigrate marriage.)

• In some settings, broad or increasing support exists for same-sex relationships, including the right to marry or to form a legally recognized union. In many settings, however, no such support exists.

• People living with HIV or AIDS may face fears or discrimination about marrying, but millions of couples have successful marriages in which HIV is a reality.

• In some settings, laws still allow or do not recognize marital rape (marital sex without spousal consent).  (PG 87)

 

7 Religions and religious leaders hold a range of perspectives on sexuality and may seek to influence norms and policies regarding sexuality and sexual rights issues. 

UFI:  Again portraying Religion in a negative context

 

These norms and policies include, for example, those related to [also see Unit 2, pages 62–63]:

sex education;

• abstinence and virginity;

• contraception and abortion;

• homosexuality;

• genital mutilation; and

• marriage.  (PG 88)

 

Girls may be discouraged or even punished for being sexually active.

• In most settings, girls receive contradictory messages about sex. Many are taught that they should not be sexually active prior to marriage.  (PG 90)

UFI:  Abstaining from sex until marriage is viewed in a negative context. 

 

SEXUAL DESIRE

 

1 There are many ways that people experience sexual desire (a longing for sexual expression or a feeling of sexual attraction). There is no one “normal” way to experience sexual desire.

• Virtually every person experiences sexual desire, sometimes of an intense nature. People may feel desire for another person (of the same sex, of the other sex, or both). Or they may feel generalized desire that is not necessarily attached to another person.  

• Within an intimate relationship, one person may feel sexual desire more than the other.

• People’s level of sexual desire may change over a short time or over the course of their lives. They may experience sexual desire until the end of their lives, although their physical response may change with age.

• People experience sexual desire in response to a wide range of stimuli. Personal preferences, life experiences, and cultural norms all influence these responses.  (PG 92)

 

 

Sexual Diversity

 

3 People may experience feelings of love, attraction, and sexual desire for the other sex, the same sex, or both. This variation has always been true throughout history.

It is true in all societies, whether or not the society accepts same-sex attraction.

• The term heterosexual is used to describe people who desire people of the other sex. The term homosexual is used to describe people who desire people of the same sex. In some settings these terms are preferred, in other settings other terms are used (see Note).

Like everyone else, transgender people (people whose gender identity differs from the sex they were assigned at birth) may be attracted to people of the same sex, the other sex, or both.

• People may or may not identify as heterosexual, homosexual (gay or lesbian), or bisexual (attracted to people of both the same and the other sex).

• People may be labeled with a sexual identity that they do not claim for themselves. Some people do not want to be labeled or categorized in terms of their sexuality or sexual identity, regardless of their desires.

• What determines whether a person experiences desire for the same sex, the other sex, or both, is not well

understood. These desires cannot be changed by religion, therapy, or medical intervention. A person’s desires, behavior, or identity may shift over time and from situation to situation.  (PG 94)

 

UFI:  heavy emphasis on “sexual pleasure” throughout the curriculum; a reoccurring theme.

 

Anatomy and Sexual Pleasure

 

Any area of the body can respond to sexual stimuli. For example, a person may feel sexual pleasure from a touch to the face, stomach, nipples, ears, legs, or anywhere else. Each person has different responses, and each person’s response depends on the situation.

3 Certain parts of the body that contribute to sexual pleasure are specific to males or to females:

[See fact sheets on Anatomy and Sexual Pleasure and on Sexual and Reproductive Systems.]

• In boys and men, they include the penis, testes, scrotum, and prostate.

• In girls and women, these parts include the clitoris, vulva, vagina, and breasts.

• The clitoris (not the vagina) is the part of the female body that is most responsive to sexual stimulation. Most females reach orgasm (sexual climax) as a result of stimulation of the clitoris (rather than from penile penetration of the vagina). Unfortunately, many people do not understand this basic fact.  (PG 98)

 

3

Sexual Expression and Enjoyment

 

 Emotional and physical pleasure are important parts of sexual well-being. Public health and rights organizations have issued declarations regarding the rights of all persons to sexual expression. These rights include the right to seek pleasure in the context of safety and of mutual and meaningful consent.

2 What feels sexually pleasurable varies by person.

People can experience sexual pleasure by touching themselves or through a shared experience (with someone of the same or the other sex). They can also experience sexual pleasure with no touching at all.

Sources of sexual pleasure may include fantasies, words, reading, watching a film, caressing, kissing, or genital contact.

• For sex to be enjoyable, people must know what feels good to them and to their partners.

3 Touching or stroking oneself (especially one’s own genitals) for sexual pleasure is called masturbation.

[See the following section titled Sexual Behavior.]

Masturbation is an important way that people learn about their bodies and sexuality.

Most people seek pleasure through masturbation throughout their lives, including periods when they have a sexual partner or are married.  (UFI:   Note marriage is optional.)

• Masturbation is a safe sexual behavior. It is neither physically nor mentally harmful.  (Pg 99)

 

POINTS FOR REFLECTION

How do attitudes about female

virginity compare with attitudes

about male virginity?

How do people treat boys who have

had more than one sex partner?

How do people treat girls who have

had more than one sex partner?

What messages do abstinence only

education, child marriage,

and female genital mutilation send

about sexual pleasure?

Do you think that most young men

understand the way that most

women reach orgasm (through

stimulation of the clitoris, rather

than through intercourse)?  (PG 100)

 

sexual behavior

SEE ACTIVITIES BOOK

Activity 2

3 1 People — regardless of their sexual identity, gender, or physical ability — can express and experience their sexuality through a variety of sexual behaviors. One sexual practice is not better (or worse) than another — as long as the partners respect each other, no one is harmed, and both partners fully consent.

 

2 Children are curious about bodies and reproduction.

• Most children touch their genitals because it feels good; this is called masturbation. Young children do not masturbate with sexual intent. [See previous section titled Sexual Expression and Enjoyment.]

• Although masturbating is safe, it is discouraged or even stigmatized within some cultures and religions. As a result, many parents are unsure about what to tell their children concerning the practice.

As children become aware of their bodies, they may explore their sexuality with friends of either sex.

 

3 Sexual behavior ranges widely.

Below are descriptions of some common sexual behaviors:

• Masturbation (touching oneself) remains a common practice throughout life for most people. Masturbation is a safe sexual behavior. It is neither physically nor mentally harmful.

Caressing, kissing, sharing erotic fantasies, stimulating a partner’s genitals with one’s hand, and rubbing against each other are practices that may lead to orgasm and do not involve penetration.

• Oral sex is mouth-to-genital contact.

Intercourse is sexual activity in which the penis enters the vagina or anus. Other forms of penetrative sex may involve using the fingers or an object.

 

4 People can share an intimate sexual experience without touching each other.

Nonpenetrative practices (without exchange of bodily fluids) do not carry the same health risks as do intercourse and oral sex.  (PG 101)

sexual behavior — myths

Concerns about Sexual Function

 

Many people develop concerns at some point about whether their sexual responses are functioning the way they should. 

 

UFI:  Seems like vast over-reaching in sexual education -schools addressing concern about sexual function?  I thought the goal was to teach children to not engage in sexual relations outside of marriage.

 

• Most concerns about sexual function relate to a person’s feelings and situation. For example, people may worry about their body parts, attractiveness, or ability to “perform” sexually. They may have learned negative attitudes about sex or have had disturbing sexual experiences. They may have negative feelings toward their partner. They may be worried about STIs, AIDS, or pregnancy, or they may be distracted by a lack of privacy. They may not know about normal variation in sexual response or may not be willing or able to talk about sexual needs.

• Less often, problems in sexual function are caused by physical factors, such as illness, alcohol, drugs, or medication.  (PG 110)

 

Sexual Well-being and Advocacy

 

3 All around the world, sexual and reproductive rights advocates — community groups, health care providers, young people, and others — are promoting greater respect, mutuality, and consent within sexual relationships. Some of the changes they are working toward include: 

UFI:  Promotion of same-sex activity and abortion.  This paragraph is phrased to make students feel that they are out of the loop if they aren’t out promoting these things.

better sex education;

• promotion of gender equality;

• elimination of laws that criminalize consensual sex between adults, such as same-sex sexual activity;

• recognition of the sexual rights of people with disabilities; and

improved access to sexual and reproductive health services, such as access to contraception and to safe and legal abortion, as well as to confidential testing, counseling, and treatment for HIV.  (PG 111)

 

9 Is sexual or intimate physical contact part of dating? 

UFI: Teaching that having sex is just a normal part of dating.  You just need to be prepared with condoms and contraceptives.

• Sometimes people who are dating find that they are physically attracted to each other and both may desire sexual contact, which may include holding hands, kissing, caressing, or other intimate activity.

• In a context of trust, mutuality, and respect, such experiences may be wonderful and exciting. They may offer chances for young people to learn about their own sexual feelings and responses.

• For many people, sharing a sexual experience always involves affection, intimacy, or love. For others, love is not always part of sex. Even in the absence of love, sex partners can share trust, respect, care, and pleasure.

Some people feel comfortable anticipating having sex. They may make sure to have condoms or another

contraceptive in advance. (Both male and female condoms can prevent pregnancy and protect against HIV and other infections.) Others may have sex without having planned for it or discussed it with their partner. They may not have thought to have any form of protection ready.

• Talking with one’s partner about having sex is important for ensuring mutual consent. Such discussions can enhance both partners’ comfort and help ensure their safety.   (PG 126)

 

UFI:  Never a point that we saw in the curriculum where there was any discussion of the limitations of condoms in terms of protection; nor was the term “safer sex” used;  it was almost always “safe sex.”

 

 

Sexual Activity in Relationships

 

3 For a person who is sexually active, what factors contribute to having a sexual relationship that is emotionally satisfying to both partners, responsible, and safe? 

UFI:  This whole paragraph implies that adolescents are going to have sex and thus it should be pleasureable, emotionally satisfying and entail use of condoms/contraceptions, etc.

In addition to factors that contribute to any interpersonal relationship (see page 123), sexual relationships in particular are often more comfortable, satisfying, and safe when both partners:

• feel intimate and cared for, and not that they are just a convenient body;

• ensure mutual consent, respect, and responsibility;

• are able to give and to accept sexual pleasure;

• feel comfortable communicating what they want or do not want;

• respect each other’s right not to do anything that feels uncomfortable;

• share in the responsibility for using safe and effective methods to prevent unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted infections, including HIV;

• know your own and your partners’ status with regard to HIV (and other STIs); and

• talk about whether or not they will have sex partners outside their relationship. When people have only one sex partner, their relationship is described as monogamous or “being faithful.”  (PG 130)

 

3 The nature of marriage and long-term intimate relationships varies from place to place and over time.  UFI:  Curriculum takes an exceptionally cavalier attitude toward marriage and uses every opportunity to promote same sex marriage and challenge existing norms in society.

• In many places, a significant proportion of couples form unions outside of marriage.

• In many societies, people find their own intimate partners or spouse. In other places, families choose a spouse for their child — someone they feel will be a suitable partner, or who will strengthen social kinship structures, or both.

• Most societies prohibit being married to more than one person at a time. Where polygamy exists, it virtually always involves one man with multiple wives, not the reverse.

• Although rates of child marriage are declining, this custom continues to affect millions of girls around the world.

In some societies, women are choosing to marry later or not at all.

• In some settings, men are marrying at later ages than they did in the past because they cannot afford to support a family.  (PG 132)

 

5 Cultural norms regarding childbirth (including the role of male partners) vary widely and are changing. 

UFI:  Telling students that they do not have to be married to bear children – encouraging out of wedlock childbearing.

• In many settings, a woman’s status may depend in part on bearing children. Particularly where women are achieving opportunities in other areas of life, however, women may feel less pressure to have children. 

• Some people believe that pregnancy and childbirth should occur only within the socially sanctioned relationship

of marriage. Increasingly around the world many others believe that children can grow up happy and healthy

regardless of the form their families take.  (PG 177)

 

4 Around the world, some couples are creating marriages or long–term relationships based on gender equality and human rights. They are doing this even where the decision challenges local norms.

[See Unit 2, pages 60–61.]

• In many settings, openness is increasing in attitudes toward marriage between people from different

backgrounds (for example, from different religions, races, or castes).

• Some societies are discussing, or voting on, the right of same-sex couples to marry or to form civil unions that carry many of the same legal rights and responsibilities as marriage.  (PG 133)

 

 

3 Today, people talk with their friends and family members about what a respectful and safe relationship means to them.  UFI:  Implanting the notion that students have lots of biases against thing like same-sex relationships and they need to be examined.  Almost implies that talking with family members and friends is going to make your biases worse.

For example:

• Many people talk to family members and friends about nontraditional relationships, such as same-sex relationships or relationships across religion, caste, or race.

• Many young people your  urge their friends and sisters to avoid older men or “sugar daddies” who offer money or gifts in exchange for sex.

• A respectful and honest conversation can also help people to think about their own biases.  (PG137)

 

POINTS FOR REFLECTION 

 UFI:  One of the few references to parents being involved.  Entails telling parents that you are attracted to same-sex.

Many decisions related to sex can

be complicated. Imagine thinking

over these decisions:

whether to have sex;

whether to insist on condom use

with a partner who is reluctant to

use condoms;

whether to end a relationship;

whether to have sex in order to

obtain a gift or money for school

fees;

whether to disclose an HIV test

result;

whether to continue or end an

unintended pregnancy; and

whether to tell one’s parents about

having romantic or sexual feelings

toward someone of the same sex.  (PG 151)

 

Step 2: Think about likely barriers to carrying out a decision. This step is important, because some decisions are very difficult to put into action. Examples of potential barriers include: 

UFI:  coaching students on how to get illegal abortion?

• not having enough money (for example, for bus fare to a clinic or for schoolbooks);

not having access to services (for example, hard-to-reach schools and clinics);

legal limits (such as laws restricting abortion or contraceptive products and services for unmarried adolescents);

• fears about social consequences (for example, of coming out as homosexual, opposing genital mutilation, resisting early marriage, being seen at a family planning clinic, or working at a job that is usually performed by the other sex); and

• worries about personal costs (for example, being rejected by a partner for refusing to have sex or for insisting on condom use, or facing a possible life-changing diagnosis).  (PG 152)

 

4 Puberty can be both confusing and exciting. 

UFI:  Encouraging sexual activity as a natural part of puberty.

• Both the physical and social aspects of puberty bring changes in the way young people feel about themselves and about other people.

• Many adolescents become curious about sex and may explore their sexuality by themselves, with a friend, or with a sexual or romantic partner.  (PG  165)

 

4 Some people who want to change their gender and sex may use hormones and/or undergo surgery to alter their sexual organs permanently. 

UFI:  Advocating for sex-change surgery

Such procedures are complicated and costly, but to those who seek it the change is of vital importance.

Adults who want to change sex should have access to counseling to help make this decision and should be free to decide whether to do so.    (PG 170)

 

5 Pregnancy may occur by means other than vaginal intercourse.  UFI:  here’s a nod to homosexuality, informing students “not to worry – you too can have children, it’s a brave new world….”  We thought Sex ed programs were promoted as a means of preventing pregnancy – not teaching how you can obtain children through alternative methods.

• People who have difficulty conceiving, do not have a sexual partner, or have a same-sex partner, may seek other means of achieving pregnancy.

• Various medical means exist to join an egg and sperm [see fact sheet on Infertility and Assisted Reproduction].    (PG 173)

 

UFI:  ONLY Reference to Abstaining from sex as “the surest way to prevent…”  Yet it goes on and implies that that doesn’t happen and rolls right into condom usage.

3 The surest way to prevent an STI is not to have vaginal, oral, or anal sex. Everyone has the right to refuse unsafe sex (or sex that is unwanted for any reason). Many people, however, cannot or do not exercise this right. This situation is especially common among women and girls who lack the power to insist that their male partners use condoms.  (PG 192)

 

UFI:  Implies below that practicing monogamy is not an effective strategy.

6 Both partners can practice mutual monogamy. This means not having any sex partners outside their primary relationship and is also known as “being faithful.”

However, a person can already be infected (even without knowing it), or may not be completely faithful. Hence promising to be faithful does not necessarily eliminate the need for practicing safer sex.  (PG 193)

 

9 A woman may obtain protection from pregnancy after she has had intercourse by using a method called “emergency contraception.”    UFI:  Promotes emergency contraception.

[See fact sheet on Emergency Contraception.]

• Emergency contraception is useful in cases when the couple did not use a contraceptive, experienced a method failure (for example, as a result of a torn condom), or when the woman was forced to have sex.

• Emergency contraception is fairly effective for as long as five days after having unprotected sex. But it works best if used as early as possible during this period.

• The most common form of emergency contraception contains a specific dose of a hormone used in many oral contraceptives. Emergency contraception pills are often packaged specifically for this purpose. In some places, the method is available without a doctor’s prescription.

• Inserting an IUD within five days of intercourse is another option for emergency contraception.

Emergency contraception is not a method of abortion. It will not end an established pregnancy.  (PG 213)

 

3 Women and girls have abortions for many reasons. 

UFI:  Promoting abortion – notice that the bulk of the reasons are “convenience” reasons, except the last two.

For example:

• They cannot afford or manage to rear a child (whether a first child or another child).

• They don’t want to become a parent at the time of the pregnancy.

• They want to finish their education.

• Their relationship with their partner is becoming difficult, or they are not in a stable relationship and do not want to rear a child alone.

• The pregnancy threatens their physical or mental health.

• They became pregnant as a result of sex that was forced or otherwise coerced.  (PG 214)

 

4 Even in situations where a woman or couple wants to continue a pregnancy, they may end it by abortion for various reasons.

For example:

• The pregnancy may threaten a woman’s physical or mental health.

• Genetic, behavioral, or environmental factors may cause serious medical risks (even death) for the fetus.

The couple is unhappy about the sex of the fetus. This feeling occurs mostly in places where society unjustly places greater value on sons than daughters. [See fact sheet on Sex Selection.]

• Some women or girls are pressured to have an abortion because of their personal or economic situation, their health status, or for other reasons. Such pressure may come from another person (for example, a parent, boyfriend, or health care provider). In countries with coercive population policies, the government may pressure women to have abortions.

 

5 Various methods exist for performing a safe abortion. Depending upon the stage of the pregnancy and the provider’s facilities, methods of abortion include a surgical procedure or medication.  PG 215 (then refers to a handout)

 

7 Many, but not all, people and governments support women’s access to safe and legal abortion.

UFI:  pro-aborts the “good guys”  Pro-life the “bad guys.”

People and governments may support legal access to safe abortion because they:

• believe that people should have access to all safe medical procedures;

• are dedicated to reducing maternal mortality, including death resulting from unsafe abortion;

• believe that women have a right to control their own lives and that the ability to control their fertility is an important part of that right;

• believe that people should be able to enjoy sexual intimacy and pleasure without reproducing;

• are concerned about population growth and want women to have access to all possible methods to control their fertility; and

• are concerned about the economic effects that result from unsafe abortion (for example, the cost of providing emergency care for women and girls who suffer complications).

 

People and governments may oppose access to abortion because they:

• hold religious or other personal beliefs that prohibit it;

• believe that women should not have control over their own lives and fertility;

• believe that sex should not be enjoyed separately from reproduction; and

• wrongly think that making abortion safe and legal will increase sexual promiscuity or will increase abortion rates.  (PG 216)

 

9 Every hour, approximately eight women and girls die (and two hundred become infertile) simply because safe abortion services are not available or accessible. These tragic outcomes are easily preventable.  UFI:  Unsubstantiated statistics. 

Although abortion is a simple and safe procedure when provided under proper circumstances, close to half of abortions are carried out under unsafe circumstances.

• Unsafe abortion is a major public health problem in many parts of the world. It affects women and girls in all walks of life, but especially those living in poverty.  (PG 217)

 

ADVOCATING FOR SEXUAL HEALTH, RIGHTS, AND GENDER EQUALITY 

UFI:  the rest of the manual focuses on training activists for their cause and teaching students to get rid of their “stereotypes” taught to them by family, religion and community.  They must challenge their assumptions regarding gender roles.  They must fight “religious and conservative movements.”

 

4 All of us can engage in self-reflection and critical thinking about our personal opinions, values, and ideas.

Following are some difficult, but important, questions each of us can consider in reflecting about community standards and fairness in the areas of gender and sexuality:

• What adjectives would I use to describe my personal traits? Are these words typically used to describe boys and men or girls and women?

• Do I feel that certain emotions such as anger or gentleness are not appropriate for girls or for boys? What are some examples?

• Do I tend to assume that I should develop (or not develop) certain skills and talents because of my sex?

• Do I tend to assume that boys and girls naturally have different intellectual capacities?

• Do I tend to listen more carefully to someone’s ideas if the speaker is a boy or a girl?

• Do I think girls don’t really need to play sports as much as boys do? Why?

• Do I consider some sexual behavior acceptable for boys but not for girls, or vice versa?

• Do I hold any stereotypes about the sexuality of people of other ethnic or racial groups? If so, on what basis have I formed these attitudes?

• What do I think about a person who identifies with a different gender than the one he or she was assigned at birth?

• How do I feel about girls having more chores at home than boys do?

• How acceptable is it for a man to be paid more than a woman for the same job?

• As an adult, would I vote for a female president? Why? Why not?

• Would I hire a man to take care of young children? Why? Why not?

• How do I feel about teasing someone I think is homosexual if the teasing is not extreme? Why do I feel that way?

• Do I think that girls and women sometimes are to blame when they are raped? If so, under what circumstances?

• On what basis did I develop these views? Where did I learn to form these attitudes?  (PG 225)

 

6 People can join local efforts to achieve fairness and equality related to gender and sexuality.

For example, they can:

• help ensure that people living with HIV and AIDS are treated fairly in the community;

• convince people in the community to stop circumcising their daughters;

• establish neighborhood watch groups to intervene in instances of domestic violence;

• create safe places where victims of domestic violence can go for help; and

• work to establish sex and gender education in schools.

 

7 People can join national campaigns to achieve fairness and equality.

Such campaigns may include those to:

• help girls stay in school;

• save girls’ and women’s lives by decriminalizing abortion;

• reform laws that punish people based on their sexual identity;

• advocate for greater government spending to prevent and treat maternal health problems (such as obstetric fistula);

• advocate for enforcement of laws that make spousal abuse and marital rape a crime; and

• ensure enforcement of laws that protect gender equality (including in the face of opposition by conservative or religious movements).  (PG 231)

 

Book 2:  Activities

 

INFORMATION FOR TEACHERS

Schools should teach young

people that they must abstain

from sex until marriage; they

should not teach about condoms,

contraception, or gender relations.

YES or NO?

In many countries a debate is

ongoing about sex education.

Those who believe that young

people should be given information

only about abstaining from

sex often think that teaching

young people about safe sex

encourages them to engage in

sexual activity earlier than they

would without that information.

Research, however, shows that

comprehensive sex education

does not lead to earlier age at

first sex. Those who believe in

comprehensive sex education

(including information on safe sex)

argue that it gives young people

the tools to make healthy, safe

decisions about their sexual lives.  (Pg. 55)

(Given as direction to the teacher, related to a class debate about Comprehensive Sex ed vs. Abstinence Education)

Halle was taught by her mother that it is important for a woman to do whatever her husband asks of her if she doesn’t want to lose him. She is engaged to be married to Hugh, and he says that now that they are engaged, it is okay for them to have sex. Halle strongly believes she should wait and wants to be a virgin when she gets married, but she thinks, “He will be my husband, and my mother says I should obey him.” Can Halle give free and informed consent?

 

I Isaac has had several partners but lets Ivan, his new boyfriend, believe that he is still a virgin, as Ivan is. When they have sex, Ivan agrees not to use a condom, thinking there is no risk of infection. Can Ivan give free and informed consent?

 

J Jin is 20 and Josef is 19. About six months ago, Jin asked Josef, her boyfriend, if he would have sex with her.  They are open and honest with each other, so he told her he was afraid of the consequences and did not feel ready. He said he would like just to kiss and touch each other for now. Jin really wanted to try intercourse, but she agreed with Josef. Now Josef thinks he is ready. He asks Jin where they can get more information to avoid any risk. Can Josef give free and informed consent?

 

Case studies: can this person give meaningful consent?

GROUP 1 Handout :

 

I was attracted to my boyfriend because he was older and no one knew him. He seemed mysterious and exciting. We fell in love and now we spend most of our time together. You know how it is. I really like listening to his stories about all his experiences. When we go out, he mostly decides where we go because he pays and knows all of these great places. He has influenced me a lot. I was never that interested in sports, but he loves football, so I spend a lot of my free time now with him at games or watching sports on TV.

After we’d known each other for a few months, he said that he wanted to make love to me. I hesitated, but I thought that he might leave me if I didn’t. He’s 23, after all, and experienced. These days, I hardly see my friends. They complain and say that I’ve changed. I miss them and sometimes I think about how I used to study more and how much I liked reading. But, you know, I just think that’s what happens when you are in love.          

 

Questions:

 

1 Different kinds of inequality exist among groups in society (for example, people may have greater or lesser status based on their ethnic or racial groups, economic class, sex, age, or other characteristics). Which forms of inequality are present in this relationship?

2 Which person has the more powerful position in this relationship as a result of his or her status in society? What is the basis for this inequality? How is this more powerful position demonstrated?

3 Which person has the inferior position in this relationship because of his or her social status? How is this inferior position demonstrated?

4 What effect, if any, does this inequality have on each person? How does it affect the relationship?

5 Do you think these kinds of issues exist in our community? Please comment on them.

student

FEELING READY TO HAVE SEX

A Feeling or Condition for Having Sex Draw here

Feeling that you are honoring your own values and

those of your partner

Feeling close to the other person

Feeling that you and the other person respect each

other

Feeling that you and the other person trust each other

Feeling that you and the other person have made the

decision together and that both of you want to have sex

Feeling comfortable with your own body

Feeling confident that you know what makes you feel

good sexually

Feeling sexually attracted to the other person

Feeling comfortable about telling the other person what

feels good sexually

Feeling comfortable about asking what feels good to

him or her

Feeling comfortable talking with the other person about

condom use

Having condoms (and/or other contraceptives) and

knowing how to use them

Knowing your HI V status

Feeling comfortable talking about your own and your

partner’s HI V status

Each of you feeling safe to say at any time if you want

to stop

Having privacy

Feeling that you are not at risk of being ridiculed or

stigmatized afterward

Other  (PG. 95)

TO PREPARE:

Review and familiarize yourself

with the fact sheets so that you

can supplement or correct students’

creations. Photocopy your

fact sheets on puberty in boys

and on puberty in girls. If feasible,

explore arrangements for your

students to present their creations

to preadolescent students.  (PG 129)

UFI:  Promoting this stuff to preadolescent students